For those who missed it, that would be the scarf that I needed your opinions to complete. And for those who helped and are waiting for their gift-pattern, it will be available soon! (See the end of this post for another opportunity to have this pattern gifted to you.) The project itself may be finished, but now comes the task of turning it into a PDF for Ravelry. It could be a simple job for me, but the program I've been using is now acting funny... Pictures are jumping around to places I didn't put them, and pages are splitting for no reason. UGH.
But, like usual, I will figure it out. (Just like with my truck.) It's frustrating and slightly disappointing that I got so close to having the pattern ready, and now there's a new problem to fight with. I'm taking a break and then I'm going to try opening a new file and starting over. If that doesn't fix it, then I'll go find another program. I'm at a point in my life where I'm sick of things constantly holding me back. If whatever is standing in my way can't be fixed, it's getting deleted. (Like my car.)
Now that the update on the pattern is over, can I cry a little over my truck? This is what I have after a "friend" was trusted to fix it... The job wasn't completed when he dropped it off in my yard, saying "it's your problem". It wasn't in perfect condition before he "worked" on it, but now it's pretty much trashed. After being left in the sun for almost a year, my dash is split in half. Brand new tires were allowed to sit flat, completely destroying them. And my tailgate was ruined when he pushed it here with an ATV. 😢
Sad, right? That's why it sat in my yard for another 3 years. It was in such a depressing state that I couldn't even look at it for awhile. I had some help from a real friend replacing the fuel pump and tank a while back, and rerouted the spark plug wires to their correct places on the coil. She still didn't run right, and I gave up. Finally, the no-car situation pushed me to get back to it. I spent last weekend disassembling the top end of the motor to find loose bolts, hoses not connected, plugs left unplugged, and a bunch of trash that never got flushed out of the engine. She runs now. It was a scary ride there on bad tires, but it was good to take her up town to get some "new shoes" and hear her running normally again. I just had to wait for the delivery of my tag-lights (also broken from the ATV-pushing) to make her completely street-worthy again, and now I can concentrate on the cosmetic fixes.
But, working on it led me to another let-down: When I dove into the good ol' times of grease and oil again, I realized how much I missed it. It was hard, dirty work to do, but I liked doing it. I love getting into the guts of things to see how it works; how it breaks; how it needs to be fixed. Crocheting may still exercise my brain with numbers and shapes, but there's just no moving parts or power to it. I found myself considering getting back into my old career again.
But by the end of the day, I was facing the truth. My hands became so stiff I was dropping everything, and Rip had to help with the things that took more muscle to complete. When I woke up the next morning, I could barely move. With RA in remission, I thought I could do it. The truck may be done, but working on it was a sad reminder that it's not possible for me to spend a day under the hood, let alone the rest of my life. And my specialty, building transmissions, takes a combination of nimble fingers and strength that I no longer have.
The thing I picked up for therapy will continue to be my new career. This yarn-y, colorful world I've found myself in is so opposite from the grease, gears and metal I knew and loved. But, the people are nicer here and I don't have to prove I know what I'm doing to every man that visits the blog. Plus, I can blast heavy metal any time I want because there's no customers to complain about it. I think it's a trade I'm willing to make. I can still be happy with my choice. 😊
PS - Just like with my old job, I'm pretty good at crochet... But sometimes, I still need a little help. For those of you who missed out on the first opportunity, I'm extending my offer to be gifted this pattern on Ravelry. This scarf needs a name! Leave a suggestion in the comments (and your Ravelry name if anonymous), and you'll receive this pattern for free once it's uploaded.
- - - - - - - - - -
PPS - Just to keep everyone updated, there will be another slight delay in getting that pattern ready. I took the truck on a long run today and lost oil pressure on the way home. I'm hoping it's just a plugged filter after the "mechanic" didn't flush all the gunk out... But I'll be spending the morning checking that out instead of working on the pattern. (It's still coming soon!)